Is envy a good thing?

You know, sometimes you see people with "more" than you've got, whatever that may be, and you just wonder... "Why not me?" That's pretty natural, I guess. The problem (or is it?) comes from when we actively envy these people... to the point where we covet whatever it is we think they have over us. Good if we're talking about a Ferrari, I guess... bad if we're talking about a husband or wife (or, rather, a SPECIFIC husband or wife). =)

Some people (and religions) would call this wrong. But is it? (Not the husband/wife part of course! That's kinda self-evident. I mean the "coveting" part...)

Capitalism would have you believe that it's essential to human economic progress. Envy is the fuel that fires the ambitious man and woman's blood, and without this opportunity for economic wealth, a lot of innovation and initiative would be lost. This is why some people oppose giving away AIDS and HIV drugs to poor people in Africa, because they say that doing this would undermine the rights of the inventors and the drug companies, and will be a DIS-incentive for them to continue working to create new, more effective drugs. If even the inventors, so the logic goes, are never going to gain any wealth for their inventions, then why even invent? Where would human progress be if humans didn't have something to aspire to?

I wonder, though, if this is necessarily true.

I mean, gone are the days when people like Thomas Edison or even Ben Franklin would invent things for invention's sake, but I figure that many of the people who get wealthy off of HIV medication are not actually the ones "inventing" this medication. The real inventors/scientists/researchers who work their butts off to find these miracle drugs don't drive Ferraris. I don't think a single one of them even drives a tricked-up Hummer.

No... what I see is that some people have learned to exploit the system so that the true beneficiaries of the "drive for innovation" are rich people who've never invented a thing in their lives... unless you count the method by which they exploit the system. :) Then they're true pioneers.

So the scientists (metaphors for the rest of us) continue inventing (while we continue working) and we all continue to covet the mansions, Ferraris, yachts and whatever else the truly rich have, never mind the fact that the truly rich got rich coz they got people like us to work for them in the first place.

You know what would truly destroy these folks? What would truly WRECK them? :) It would be if everyone on earth decided that they would be content with what they had... that they would be happy with good food on the table, a loving family, free public education and a government that didn't arrest them everytime they spit on the sidewalk or gave their own opinions. Look at Denmark... as free and open a society as you'll find in the world, where education, health care, and so forth are all taken care of, and are all good. What if we all decided we'd like to live a good, solid MIDDLE-CLASS life, and that we were done "coveting" the goods we didn't really need anyway? (Who needs a Ferrari in rush hour traffic?)

Of course, if we did all this, the truly rich would go crazy. :) I'm not saying they wouldn't be rich... but they certainly wouldn't have as much power over the rest of us. They wouldn't be able to exploit the very best and brightest minds, the ones that truly fuel their enterprises. Of course, there would still be factory workers working for them, but if the really smart people in the world decided not to be slaves to industry, and to instead be content with living comfortable lives, then would people like Bill Gates or Steve Jobs, smart as they are, have been able to build up Microsoft and Apple?

Think, for a moment, of a radical world where the rich governments paid more for scientific research than for military capability. Imagine how many HIV drugs (and others) could have been developed with the more than 300 billion US dollars spent in Iraq (an expense that, sadly, looks to have been ill-conceived and ultimately futile). Imagine if all those smart people, the moder-day Edisons, got paid exactly the same amount, with the same benefits, by the government for work that could save MORE lives than they did today. Would they not work just as hard, or even harder? Or is the spirit of helping others and saving lives not as big a motivational factor as a Ferrari?

None of this will happen, of course. The government will never undermine private businesses. The really smart people will never be content with middle-class lives when they see the possibility of living in a mansion. And the really rich won't ever need to panic, because greed will always be the prime motivational force in society, capitalist or otherwise. Envy may not prove to be good, in the end, from a moral standpoint, but it has already proven to be necessary, from where society stands today.

Having said all of this, I won't be hypocritical and say that I DON'T want to be as rich as Bill Gates. I am, after all, a businessman now. Of course I want to make money. Of course I want a better life for myself and my family. I just want to keep reminding myself that envy is a bad thing in my life, because if I continue to let myself envy others for what they have that I don't, if I continue to push myself to gain the capitalistic ideal of success, I fear I will lose sight of the person I want myself to be. I fear that, if I ever have a family of my own, I will lose track of making them happy because I want them to live in an even better and bigger house, or to enjoy ever more spectacular vacations.

Think about it. When was the last time a three year old's happiness relied on how big your yacht was? For most, if not all of them, true happiness is getting a hug from people who truly love and care for them. I wonder, sincerely, just how many of those people Donald Trump has in his privileged life.

Oh, but I forget, I'm supposed to envy him. :) After all being a "Donald Trump" is what the whole capitalistic dream is all about. I just wonder why I see more smiles in a day care center than I've ever seen from him, or any other rich person I've ever met in my life.

What do you most regret in life?

If there was one thing you could do over again, one thing you could change, which thing would it be? Which single thing causes you the most regret?

I hear some folks say that they wouldn't want to change a thing, coz everything they are is due to the choices they made before, and they're generally happy with the choices they made.

Well, as far as I'm concerned, if anyone had the opportunity to change something about his/her life, I think that person would be stupid not to. We've all made many big mistakes in the past... mistakes that have hurt people. Don't you think the least we could do is try to right some wrongs?

As far as I'm concerned, this question is too damn hard to answer. I mean, like everyone I've ever met, I have many regrets. The problem is in choosing which one thing I'd like to change the most.

What about you? What do YOU regret most?

What would you do on the last day of your life?

Interesting question, I think. So many of the people I know have, at some point, complained about either their jobs, their relationships, their location, etc. etc... I just thought "if you hate things so much... why continue?"

I mean, it's really quite simple. Stop doing things that you just can't stand doing. If there really is no point to doing them, then you're probably not being so smart if you continue doing them. And if there IS a point to doing them, because you perhaps have a goal or end in sight, then it's pretty pointless to complain about having to do what you know you would do anyway. Really, what's the point?

I admit: I don't like people who complain and nag and just plain feel sorry about life. I think that if you took a poll of the most successful people on earth, you'd find that they spend the vast majority of their time working at being successful, rather than whining about why they're not.

So, if you're in a job you just can't stand, quit. If you're in a relationship that's just eating you up inside, leave. If you're living in a place you just can't stand, then by all means go somewhere else. And if you tell me "but I can't... it's just too complicated," then you've lost all credibility in my eyes. You've basically just given up, and aren't trying hard enough. I'd rather hear "Yes, I will... and I'm working towards that." THAT I can respect.

So... really... what WOULD you do on the last day of your life? Take away all the b.s. in the world, and just focus on those dreams and goals you consider most important. Focus on the people who matter most. Live the life you really want to live. And if you're doing NONE of the above, then, really, what the heck kind of life are you leading anyway??? If you are not doing a single thing you would be proud of when you look back at your life, you aren't really living your life.

Too busy

Caught up in all the work that is needed to start up a business... I find it hard to find time for myself. I end up sleeping around 3 or 4 am everyday just to be able to catch up on personal e-mails, watch a few selected shows I've downloaded, and so on... I just don't have energy to move from my chair, but I wouldn't give up this business for anything. I've worked too hard for it to give it up just because I have to sleep late or feel tired. :)

But this just makes me appreciate the little things. I mean, this past week I couldn't watch a movie because I had some parents walk in and ask about the business, and while I appreciate all business, I certainly could have used a movie around then. :) I ended up watching the latest episode of American Idol Season 6, which was a happy compromise.

Ah, well. :) At this rate, I'll be working 7 days a week. But as I told another friend recently... "It's not really work when you're working for yourself. It's easy when it's like that."

:)

Some things in life are worth fighting for

It's been a while since I've written, partly because I've been busy, and partly because circumstances dictated that I remain silent for a bit.

Times change, however, and now I have my voice again.

This past month has seen significant changes in my life, not the least of which involves me opening a new academy in Seoul. :) I've had to overcome the usual bureaucratic red-tape and so on... and a determined enemy or two hell-bent on trying all means (mostly illegal) to try to prevent me from starting the business. Thank God for powerful friends. :)

I have been wondering, over the last few weeks, whether staying in Korea is even worth it. Even with so many people backing me up, the existence of certain types of (nasty) people, plus my less than warm reception in the land of the morning calm (at least from the average Korean citizen), made me consider whether I should spend the prime years of my life here. After all, I'm not ever going to be considered a native no matter how hard I try to assimilate into the culture. Most families won't ever consider accepting me as a son-in-law. Most people would consider me inferior.

But it's the aforementioned friends who make me stay on; that and my stubborn nature. :) I am not the type to abandon my friends in a fight, and I am certainly not the type to ever give up. Those two combined helped me to make up my mind: for now, and the foreseeable future, my fate lies somewhere in Korea (hopefully South... :).

Some things ARE worth fighting for. And when you have a country still in its debate infancy, struggling to learn what it can from whomever is willing to teach it, I would not be able to live with myself if I gave up and let certain less-qualified people take over the scene. If that means I take a bit more heat, then so be it. I've lived in Manila in the summer; I can take it. :)

So I guess this signals a new beginning for 2007. Let's see where this all goes. As for me, I've fastened my seatbelt and I'm ready for the ride.

=)

It's a cold day today

So many things have happened lately that it's impossible for me to truly update this blog in one post. Plus, I'm naturally a private person so some things have to remain a secret anyway. The fact that it's a cold day today isn't encouraging me to open up either.

But as for the things I can reveal:

1) I'm starting a business, and within a week or two it will all come to fruition. I'm excited about it, even though this does tie me down to Korea for the foreseeable future. I may end up staying her up to my early 40's at this rate;

2) I've had to reassess where I am in life, and what it is I'd like to be doing. I can't say I'm 100% happy with everything that's happened, but everything is part of a learning process, and the best I can do is to try to make the correct choices out of all my options. Now that I've decided to stay in Korea for some more years, however, my set of choices will be radically different from what they were before. I'm wondering just how well I deal with it;

3) Friends are so valuable and make life so worthwhile. If it weren't for my friends, I'd be lost right now;

4) I love all my students at Daewon. I haven't had a job this fulfilling in a long time, and part of my decision to start a business and stay long-term is due to the fact that I'm enjoying myself so much at the school. Let's just hope the new batch of students is similar to the old... :)

5) I'm committed to getting back in shape. I'm tired of always feeling tired after work, and a great deal of that is due to my lack of physical fitness. I have got to get my act together again. Enough is enough.

I hope the coming Christmas season is going to be much warmer and happier for everyone. Please do take some time to pray for those who perished and suffered through Typhoon Durian in the Philippines. My sincerest condolences go out to the families of everyone who was lost.

I appreciate...

-My friends, without whom life would be so empty and cold.

-My super-fast internet connection, which allows me to surf the internet about a million times faster than when I first got it.

-My job at Daewon, which brings me in contact with fantastic, smart, fun kids. I haven't enjoyed working for anyone this much in ages.

-My opportunities in life. Things are slowly shaping up for me here in Korea, and I may even end up living here for a long time.

-My family, who have always supported me. I love you all.

Business tycoon? :)

Don't ask why, but I've lately had a change in where I want my life to go. Now I'm focusing on starting businesses.

I have decided to invest in businesses (wherever I find them) that I feel are going to provide long-term profits for me. Korea, Thailand, Philippines... wherever. :)

I'll let you know where I stand after about a year or two, but don't be surprised if I have shares in companies in at least three countries. I just got tired of people questioning why I don't seem to be so hell-bent on making money. I figure I'll just invest in businesses so OTHER people can be hell-bent on making money with my money, and I just relax and wait for the returns to come in.

After all, what kind of businessman would I be if I was the one who did all the work? =)

Philippines per capita income: $1,463

I just read in the Philippine Daily Inquirer today that the Philippines per capita income is now $1,463, which is the highest it has been in the post-war era. (Of course, among all those other years, if you adjust for inflation, I'm sure you'll find quite a few which are above today's level.)

Just think about that for a second. The highest level in the post-war (WWII) era is $1,463???

Makes me realize just why so many Filipinos leave their country to seek work abroad. There is just no way, no way at all, that over 90% of Filipinos can hope to have a comfortable life with that kind of income. All the best universities in the Philippines (with the exception of the University of the Philippines) cost a lot of money to enter (I know of some whose tuition PER SEMESTER exceeds the income an average Filipino gets for a YEAR). Without "elite-level" education, how can Filipinos find jobs, especially in this competitive world? Without good jobs, how can they hope to feed their families and educate THEIR children in the future? The vicious downward spiral keeps going on and on... with no end in sight. I mean, if an average Filipino tried to pay rent on a decent (read: clean and reasonably safe) apartment, then he would have to pay more than the average per capita income just to have a place to stay... forget food, clothing, utilities and, God forbid, public transportation. He'd have to walk to the nearest banana tree to get a meal. (Which fact assumes that: a) there is a banana tree within 100 kilometers of his home that hasn't already been ravaged by hungry Filipinos and b) he is legally entitled to take the bananas, given that the rich (and decidedly few) landowners in the Philippines would probably shoot him for even trying...)

Damn. How the heck can a Filipino ever hope to see a brighter day with these numbers?

I am really fortunate to have been blessed with the skills and the opportunities to earn a much higher income, but I still can't help feeling sad that there's no way I could ever raise a family in the Philippines in the way I would like with the salaries they pay their workers, not unless I was a CEO or business owner. And the latter alternatives would take too long anyway. If I want to be able to raise a family soon (and who wouldn't be thinking this at my age?), I have no other option but to stay outside the shores from which my blood came.

It's enough to make a man really sad.

Chosun Ilbo article: Korean Food Among World's Most Expensive

taken from: Chosun Ilbo, Sept.9, 2006 (Online edition)

Korean Food Among World's Most Expensive

The prices of major foods including beef, pork, milk and potatoes in Korea are the fifth highest among 34 leading economies. The country has become one of the world’s most expensive nations, with consumer prices soaring about 20 percent since 2000.

A comparative study on consumer price growth in 30 OECD member countries from 2000 to the first six months of 2006 showed Korea experiencing a growth rate of 20.3 percent on average, the sixth highest after Turkey, Hungary, Mexico and Spain. During the same period, consumer prices increased 17.8 percent in the U.S., 16.6 percent in Britain and 6 percent in Switzerland, while the rate fell 1.3 percent in Japan and 4.9 percent in Hong Kong. Food prices climbed 22.3 percent on average in Korea, the fifth highest among OECD countries and far higher than the averages of the OECD (16.3 percent) and EU (12.9 percent.)

According to statistics on wages and food prices in 34 major countries compiled by the International Labor Organization, beef cost US$48.09 per kg in Korea, the second most expensive following Japan with $76.52. The prices of apples and potatoes were the second highest among studied countries, and 77 percent and 110 percent higher than those in the U.S. Korean milk was twice as expensive as U.S. milk. Pork cost $13.1 per kg, the fourth highest after Norway and Switzerland. Rice was sold for $2.15 per kg, the eighth highest, and bread cost $1.66 per 500 g, the seventh highest.

When Korean consumer prices are set as the standard of 100, U.S. prices stood at 180 in 2000. But the figure dropped to 148 in 2002, 116 in 2005 and 110 in June 2006. In other words, U.S. consumer prices were 80 percent higher than in Korea in 2000 but only 10 percent higher this June. British and Swiss consumer prices were twice as high as Korea with 180 and 209 in 2000 but only at 126 and 159 June this year. In Japan, consumer prices were 1.38 times as expensive as in Korea in June, down from 2.64 times.

Jeon Young-jae, a senior researcher at the Samsung Economic Research Institute, said prices have been growing rapidly in Korea since prices of imported goods are still high compared to advanced nations due to the nation’s limited opening of the manufacturing goods and service markets. “What’s more, productivity has improved at a lower pace than in other developed countries."

R.I.P. - Steve Irwin, The Crocodile Hunter

This news is sad... :(

He had such zest for life that you couldn't help but be enthused everytime you saw him. May he rest in peace, and may his wife Terri, and his children, recover from this tragedy.

* * * * *

THE Crocodile Hunter, Steve Irwin, is dead.

He was killed in a freak accident in Cairns, police sources said today.

It is understood he was killed by a stingray barb that went through his chest and reportedly into his heart .

He was swimming off the Low Isles at Port Douglas filming an underwater documentary when the tragedy occured.

The Queensland Ambulance Service (QAS) was called about 11am (AEST) and an emergency services helicopter was flown to the crew's boat on Batt Reef, off the coast near Cairns, with a doctor and emergency services paramedic on board.

Irwin had a puncture wound to the left side of his chest and was pronounced dead at the scene.

http://www.news.com.au/story/0,23599,20349888-2,00.html

Updates

It's been way too long since I blogged last. I guess things have just flown by rather quickly...

Here are just some random updates on my life and on developments in Korea:

1) I'm quite happy right now, having both a fulfilling career and a satisfying personal life. I'm blessed, quite frankly, and while the tendency would be to second-guess what's happening and maybe wonder when it's all going to end, I'm going to just take the "take it one day at a time" route instead. God's been good to me, and I'm very grateful.

2) With regard to work, I've started teaching an extra 8 hours a week. This takes my teaching load at Daewon to a grand total of 18 hours a week. I know a lot of ex-colleagues who'd kill for that kind of schedule, so I'm just happy to have the opportunity to do other things during the week;

3) With regard to my personal life, I've just come back from a great vacation in Thailand. I love that country, and honestly want to retire there in the future. I don't know if I'll be given the opportunity to do that, but it would make me happy if I could visit it at least once a year. I just have too many fond memories and good friends to ever really say "goodbye" to that place.

4) Love is good. :) I'm a rather secretive sort, so I'll leave it at that. But it is good. :)

5) The Korean High School Nationals are over, and we've already selected 21 kids who will be part of the national team training pool. All of the former national team members who participated (Seo Hee, Bo Kyeong and Suhyun) made it to the pool, so I'm happy for them. I'm also excited to coach some new blood. The tryouts promise to be very interesting...

That's it for now. Will post pictures soon.

Back from the World Schools Debating Championship

It's been a month since I've updated this blog, and the reason for that was the 2006 World Schools Debating Championship (WSDC) held in Cardiff, Wales, from July 5th to the 14th.

I spent the past month training the Korean national debate team, first in Thailand (for a week) and then the succeeding two weeks in Wales. This past week was merely my "detox" period, so my body could rest.

First of all, let me proudly announce that Korea is a Quarterfinalist at this year's WSDC, the first time it's ever achieved that distinction, and the first time, if I'm not mistaken, that an EFL (English as a Foreign Language) team has ever made it to that point in the tournament. Add to this the fact that we beat the no.1 seed, Pakistan, in the Octofinals (round of 16), which is the first time it's ever been done in WSDC history, and you have a very successful tournament indeed. The fact that one of the Korean debaters, Seo Hee, was named the No.1 EFL speaker was the icing on the cake.

I'm proud of all the team members this year (Bo Kyeong, Hye Won, Jihye, Seo Hee and Suhyun), and am also grateful to all the people who supported us and helped make it possible (Joshua, as team manager, Jiho and Jungwon as judges, and Bo Yun, Hoon Ik and Sang Jin as observers and valuable researchers). Thanks also goes to our middle-school observers, Christine and Jay, who flew all the way to the UK to witness our historic triumph.

I'd also like to publicly appreciate the tremendous help offered by our friends in Thailand, such as Amp, Billy, Praew, Tanya, Pat, Namwan, Rut, TJ, Sara, Nico, Sabiha, Peter, Suree, Saurabh and everyone else. Thanks to you, Team Korea had a very fruitful and enlightening practice week leading up to the WSDC. I'm truly grateful.

Lastly, to everyone from Korea who helped to support the team, in training and elsewhere, I'm also sincerely thankful. Thanks, especially, to Ah Young, Jumin, Jong Min and everyone else who went to trainings and helped the team learn, either by debating against the team, or providing valuable input and feedback.

Now that I've reached the end of this Oscar-like litany of thanks, I only have one more thing to say: British food is good, but Korean food is sooooooooooooo much better. ;) So, for that matter, is practically every other food in the world. =)

On life, love and food

Love is nothing more than having faith in something greater than yourself. For us to truly love anything or anyone, we must first find within us the strength to let go of our fears, and to embrace something we cannot yet see to the end of.

Will it always be good? Of course not. Will you ever get hurt? Naturally. That's the reason why love is so precious. It hurts us in ways we could never imagine, but still we hang on... because we realize how precious it really is. Besides, we only really live once. How sad would it be to grow old knowing that you had rejected the chance to be happy, just because you were afraid of being sad? Is the point of life simply the avoidance of all pain? Or is it to experience everything life could offer, good and bad?

The best analogy I could think of is rice. It's absolutely tasteless. No chance of ever getting food poisoning from it. No allergies, no rashes, no spices, no taste. It just is. And yet how many of us live for the day when we can eat only rice? Sure food can be spicy, sweet, sour, salty or anything and everything in between... but how much more joy is in our lives because we can eat the foods that truly excite us? And would we ever be foolish enough to give up eating something just because someone couldn't cook it right now and then?

I don't know about you, but I don't only want to eat rice for the rest of my life. I want to eat all the greatest foods in the world: beluga caviar, tom yam kung, kimchi, sushi, penang char kway teow, pate de foie gras, buffalo mozzarella with fresh tomatoes and olive oil, szechuan shrimps, etc. etc.

Life would seem so boring with nothing but rice.

Would you pay $1.2 million for this car?

So you wanna fly? Try the Bugatti Veyron, which goes so fast that they had to design it not to take off. For slightly more ($1 million) than your Average Joe Enzo, you can do what most people will never, ever get to do – which is generally the point of spending all that cash. In this case, the money goes toward owning the fastest passenger car ever built, a phenomenal exercise in engineering, perseverance and the great lengths a rich person will go in the ultimate game of one-upmanship. The engine, an 8.0-liter W16 (that’s two V8’s fused together) that has four turbochargers, gets 1,001 horsepower. It carries a dry sump lubrication system and a giant radiator so as to handle the amount of heat that comes from all that power, and burns about 1.33 gallons of gasoline per minute.

Frankly, that’s an obscene amount of excess.

Price: Around $1.2 million

Source: ESPN.com

Go Red Devils!

I went to City Hall in Seoul to watch the World Cup match between Korea and France this past Monday morning. It was amazing to see tens of thousands (a hundred thousand? more?) of Koreans just jammed in there, at 4 a.m., cheering their guts out for their team. When Park Ji-Sung scored the equalizer in the 81st minute, I swear there was an absolutely defeaning eruption from the people in the streets, no doubt mirrored in every public place and private home in all of Korea.

This led me to a few observations of the Korean people:

1) It's amazing just how patriotic Koreans can get. I have NEVER seen a more patriotic people in my life. Ever. And I've been to five different continents;

2) I was tremendously impressed with how Koreans clean up after their own mess. Right after the match was over, thousands of Koreans (plus yours truly) started picking up the trash/litter found on the street and putting them in plastic trash bags for easy collection by the city sanitation workers. I went to City Hall about an hour or two after the game, and it was spotless! Absolutely clean. Even cleaner than Manila City Hall without any celebration. Then again, that's Manila...;

3) Football is the perfect game to get a whole nation enthralled, and Koreans prove this. It's 90 minutes (or more), with very few goal-scoring opportunities... so it builds up anticipation like no other game. Anything can happen in the final minutes (or seconds), and because there are so few goals, when one is actually scored, it gives countries an excuse to go absolutely bananas. I never really appreciated football until I lived in Thailand... but I can now understand why people LOVE the game after living in Korea;

4) Koreans, in general, are quite orderly. No massive rioting (unless you're a farmer fighting the WTO =), no major need for tear gas from the police, etc., etc. Very large aggrupations of people are not at all frightening. I know if I were stuck in the middle of a band of cheering football fanatics from... England, for instance, I would be afraid. Very afraid; and

5) The color red absolutely fits the Korean people. No doubt about it. Red is the color of passion, fire, excitement, heated emotions, anger, shouting, etc. etc... It's what Koreans are all about. :) If there's one nation on earth I could be SURE would be passionate, it would be Korea. It's not always good, as many Koreans I've met have demonstrated when angered, but it does make for great cheering sessions. :)

So, for the first time in my life, let me say... "Go Red Devils!" =)

Starbucks more fattening than McDonald's?

This counts as something in the "interesting to know" department...

Who knew that Starbucks could be so fattening?

* * * * *

"A 20-ounce Venti banana mocha Frappuccino with whipped cream contains 720 calories and 11 grams of saturated fat, and a banana cream crunch bar weighs in at 630 calories and 25 grams of saturated fat. By comparison, a McDonald's Corp. Big Mac has 560 calories and 11 grams of saturated fat."

Source: Reuters

Last day of work!

This is my last official day of work for the term. :) I still have other work, of course, related to national team training, etc., but this is my last day with my formal employer for this term. I'm expected back on August 5th.

:)

I suppose this is going to be good for me because it will give me a chance to renew my batteries for the long haul. I never realized just how valuable vacation time really could be. I won't ever take it for granted again.

After today, all I want to do is spend quality time with friends and/or myself. I wonder if I should party tonight?

Hmmm... ;)

I'm tired...

I'm just tired. Mentally, physically, emotionally...

I need something to renew me. No matter how strong a person may or may not be, it is impossible to sustain energy for everything in life without having something to renew that energy.

I don't know where to look, but I hope I find that source of renewal soon. Otherwise I may just break.

I know it's funny that I'm saying this now, after such a good start to my day, but I guess I was just on a "sugar-high" that time... it's hard to sustain enthusiasm when the source of your energy is your own, finite well of emotions.

Maybe it's all the work I've been doing lately. Fulfilling as it may be to teach young people, it still takes a lot of emotional and physical energy. It takes a huge toll, really. And I would normally take my off-days as opportunities to rest and relax, but my off-days are when I train the national team, or do other work.

I think I will have to declare a moratorium on things that cause me grief... at least for a week or so. I just need the break before I crack under all the non-stop stress.

I'll reassess my life after, and see if I'm really heading down the path I want to head, or if the price I'm paying is worth the potential reward.

It's never too late to fulfill your dreams

This story was taken from www.inq7.net
http://news.inq7.net/breaking/index.php?index=3&story_id=79207

San Francisco grandmother, 98, gets high school diploma
First posted 10:14am (Mla time) June 15, 2006 By Agence France-Presse

SAN FRANCISCO -- A diminutive grandmother donned a cap and gown on Wednesday and fulfilled a dream she had abandoned 80 years earlier -- she got her high school diploma.

"I felt like I had missed something," Josephine Belasco said when asked what inspired her to complete the schooling she began at Galileo High School when it opened in 1924.

"I thought, gee, if I could ever get that, I'd have a fruitful life," Belasco said.

Born in Calabria, Italy, in November of 1907, Belasco was 18 when she moved to San Francisco with her family.

She was one semester shy of graduating from Galileo when she dropped out to care for a severely ill sister and took a job with an insurance company to help support her family.
Her career as an accountant spanned 36 years. She married and became a mother, then a grandmother.

A grandson inspired her to go back to school and get her diploma, she said.

School officials still had her records on file, and arranged for her to earn an honorary diploma by completing tutoring sessions with Galileo students. The typical ages of high school graduates there are 17 or 18 years old.

Belasco held a white flower as she was escorted to her chair on stage during the high school graduation ceremony on Wednesday.

Her late-in-life accomplishment garnered nationwide attention, including a telephone call at home from late night television show host Jay Leno.

"I'm over the sun and the moon," Belasco said after getting her diploma. "I'm just stunned. I can't believe it mushroomed like this."